The end.

goodbyeIn theory gravity exists but, I have yet to drop everything to show that it can be proven. Burnt out I am curled up inside my head. I focus closely on tomorrow and make plans that seem easy; but sticking to them will be the death of me. Consumed entirely by what surrounds me, I realize it has been a couple of weeks since I posted.

 I Inhale, a silent pause exploring the stillness within the air. Breathing out my lungs feel heavy as if there is something missing. The memories of this year started as a downward spiral now present themselves.  From loss of life, to love and time; this hand full of sand slips through my grip and lays in an unrecognizable pattern on the floor. 

This year started near the end of a journey on  the frozen tundra where the only thing that kept me warm or sane was a love that I came to find.  If I could have made the sun stay a little longer or the snow less unbearably cold; maybe then things would have been different. I am confident now that being chemically poisoned didn’t help contribute.  Bringing along with it short-term memory loss, blurry vision and riveting headaches. I was physically awake but consciously day dreaming.  Trying to explain the situation or make sense of what the doctors said was tormenting.  The neurological test results showed cognitive deficits but, I think it adds nicely to my craziness.

Moving back home was inevitable while I looked for a new job. The strange feeling of telling your parents what you’re doing feels like your tied to a leash. My first job back this year was at Subway working under an extraordinary supervisor for a few months. Then without much warning; I was forced to pack up and move again. As my  parents moved to Kansas and I headed to Greeley. It  was about a month later I was accused and arrested for shoplifting but I never stole a thing. As if each key is pressed with guided direction, but the future still unpredictable. Taking what I can best describe as an honest approach to the end. I have my eyes set on the horizon but this year has been… Interesting.

Peering across the room at my phone as if I am expecting it to vibrate. With hopes I will pass the mind of  a distant friend. I am reminded that all good and bad things come to an end. Yet I feel I owe it to “you”  those who have taken time to dissect my words or follow and read what I have to say. I wanted to fill in the blanks at what made me who I am this year.

Before I get teary eyed or start to erase. I am looking forward to 2013  my birthday is coming up in the week ahead. The first year I have never had plans for my birthday. I am super excited for what the future is going to unfold.  So my friends. and all you amazing people who have followed me to this point; If you want to share your thoughts the door is open. Take care, and may blessing come your way. See you next year!

~~Here is a link to my Etsy shop~~
After much careful debate I have reduced my pricing to reflect a more realistic price to get my art out into the world. 

This entry was published on December 17, 2012 at 3:11 am. It’s filed under Blogging, Poems, Strictly Inspirational and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.


Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: